A Love Letter to my Inner Masculine

    Updated: Nov 25, 2018


    HELLO & WELCOME!

    I am a passionate personal development coach and spiritual advisor with a long history of over-coming and thriving with chronic illness.

    I am also a visionary who encourages radical authenticity and promotes free-thinking.

    Read at your own discretion, trigger warning always in effect.



    I identify as a woman. A woman who often holds a primary masculine energy.

    I am cognizant regarding the awareness that I hold masculine and feminine energies within me.

    I am also aware I have grown up in a society that has conditioned me to live in a masculine oriented patriarchal world. (A conditioning that began milenia ago, so I see you too -men, you were conditioned as well and often with no one to educate you on what healthy masculinity is)

    I allowed this to affect my understanding of what healthy masculinity is and was, especially due to my "daddy" issues that I allowed to recycle in my relationships, often blaming the men as I choose and permitted to be treated repeatedly in a certain way as my soul cried out for healing, (thank you to those men as I learned a lot from you and no longer need that imbalanced energy to be present)

    I demonized men for a while, until I realized I was also demonizing and supressing the healthy masculine energy that I embody. As I hated men, I couldn't deny that I was hating the inner masculine within me too.

    I tried to compensate by polarizing into a woman who hyper-comensated in my feminine energy and tried to be my own man) taking on the very energy that was dished out to me by imbalanced men.

    I became tired. Exhausted. Sick. Worse.

    I was highly imbalanced.

    I educated myself and understood that if I allowed my authentic feminity to rise within (authentically, not the one who demonized masculine energy and acted like a bully) I also allowed my inner masuline to harmonize too.

    I stopped acting like a "neo-feminist empowered" woman by living in and acting out a toxic male energy as a woman and claimining and teaching empowerment.

    (I am teaching women's and men's empowerment very differently now, one that honors both aspects of who we are as a human).

    I forgave myself, my society, and the men I took this out on. I forgave God as I too demonized him for allowing this mess to take place. I regained my own faith, in my own way aside from any "religion".

    I healed my own shit and now my mission is to assist in the understanding --that this very taboo subject begins WITHIN.

    If there is an emotional reaction to my personal and experiential statement:

    1. You may be attaching to a word or phrase and taking it the wrong way

    2. You may feel as I did when I was significantly imbalanced

    3. You are not ready to take personal responsibility and choose to live in victim mentality.

    4. You simply do not and cannot hold space for someones story if it doesn't fit compartmentalize in you "box"

    *the individuals who have bravely addressed this within will see right through the woundology and trauma.

    You are welcome to leave - as I won't tolerate unconsciousness and inner child reactionary responses on my page, it's mine to manage. I control the energy around me and on my page as you can too. I welcome debate, just conscious debate.

    Anger is not going to make this place any better, healing will and this requries you to take accountablity to your own inner healing and the people who hurt you in your past and understand why you may demonize and exonerate an energy that lives within you. Yes, distortion is all around, but focusing on you is the only way you will find peace. And when you embody peace that naturally is offered to the world externally. (See how this works, it's not rocket science but does require one to battle with the toxic aspects of the ego, which many are just not willing to do).

    I support everyone and how you want to express in this world. I really don't care what color you are, how you identity, what gender you prefer to partner with....I am simply asking if you give a shit and have anger towards any aspect of you, whether masculine or feminine, seek within for your own well-being. I dance between both worlds now, aware of which is more dominant on a specific day. It’s the dance. Live in and love them equally.

    I have authortity in this subject because I have healed my masculine and feminine war within. And it was a war.

    Welcome to the new paradigm.

    I love authentic woman. I love authentic men.

    And to offer any hope in this situation to all the women and men who feel that there is no hope for masculinity, let it be known it has been the men reaching out for healing in my practice for months now. And cognizant women that realize they too hold aspects of overcompensated masculine within. To those who seek balance and love, I salute you. We need you.

    DON’T BUT INTO THE POLARIZATION THEY ARE SELLING YOU. THIS KEEPS IS ENSLAVED. HEAL. The system makes a damn good living off of keeping us living in hate.